My Lucky Tooth

By Tyler Sikov

tooth

8:30 AM- I wake up and find that my Lucky tooth is missing. I love that tooth and I must find it.

12:30 PM- I wake up for real this time, hoping that I had only dreamt the loss of my Lucky tooth.

2:30 PM- Ok, Now I am definitely awake.

2:35 PM- I search every inch of my room to find my Lucky tooth.

2:50 PM- My Lucky tooth is nowhere to be found. It must have been stolen.

3:00 PM- I cry myself to sleep.

8:30 AM- I wake up and find that my Lucky tooth is missing. I love that tooth and I must find it.

12:30 PM- I wake up for real this time, hoping that I had only dreamt the loss of my Lucky tooth.

2:30 PM- Ok, Now I am definitely awake.

2:35 PM- I search every inch of my room to find my Lucky tooth.

2:50 PM- My Lucky tooth is nowhere to be found. It must have been stolen.

3:00 PM- I cry myself to sleep.

8:30 AM- I wake up and find that my Lucky tooth is missing. I love that tooth and I must find it.

12:30 PM- I wake up for real this time, hoping that I had only dreamt the loss of my Lucky tooth.

2:30 PM- Ok, Now I am definitely awake.

2:35 PM- I search every inch of my room to find my Lucky tooth.

2:50 PM- My Lucky tooth is nowhere to be found. It must have been stolen.

3:00 PM- I cry myself to sleep.

1:00 AM- I wake up, and question whether Lucky tooth is even mine. I remember the saying if you love something let it go. When I found Lucky tooth, it was love at first lick. 

3:00 AM- I am there, standing over my room mates bed. That is when I see the red coming from his mouth, I have found my new Lucky tooth.

8:30 AM- I wake up to find that I have recovered Lucky tooth, I scream at him angrily, “Don’t you ever leave me again!”. But I cant stay mad at Lucky tooth. I Love you Lucky tooth.

Quiz: Are These Lines From TLC’s “Toddlers And Tiaras” Or Porn Films?

By Shannon Kelly
 https://i2.wp.com/cdn2-b.examiner.com/sites/default/files/styles/image_content_width/hash/c6/d6/1373608357_5660_toddlers.jpg
1. “Why are you still wearing that?”
2. “I said smile.”
3. “You’re not ten years old.”
4. “You can’t cry. Stop crying.”
5. “There are girls out there that would kill for this.”
6. “You’re making Daddy so proud right now.”
7. “Mommy wants you to finish first.”
8. “I’ll buy you whatever you want afterwards.”

9. “Suck it up.”