Review of Sentience: Starts Off Strong, Quickly Declines

By Danial Smith

For the past 19 years, I’ve experience the phenomenon known as sentience. Odds are you’re familiar with it. But in case you’re not and are on the fence about trying it, I’m here to help clear up any doubts. Overall, sentience is painfully mediocre. It starts off strong, but quickly declines in quality. The first couple years were pretty unclear and confusing. Most of the time you’re not really sure what’s going on and you’re hungry and upset. After a few years, it hits its peak. The novelty of it all is still relatively fresh, and the crushing realities of this bleak world haven’t quite set in yet. Around the 12th year in, things start to get awkward and uncomfortable. People get meaner and everything gets harder. At this point, it’s all downhill from here. For years to come, you’ll find yourself questioning your very existence and (ironically?) joking about walking into traffic. Overall, the whole experience seems uninspired and quite average. I think my 2.5/5 star rating is being generous.

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