As you very well know, The Pittiful News has a long running series of (100% true) stories about Pitt’s chancellor, Patrick Gallagator, a well known lizard-person. Important facts about the Gallagator include that he lives in a dungeon under the cathedral and leaves shed skin all over the place. Our dear friends over at The Black Sheep, a “humor” publication with branches on many college campuses including Pitt, recently “borrowed” this idea in an article about conspiracy theories. Now we understand why they would “borrow” this material, since it is so groundbreaking and captivating, but fair is fair and The Pittiful News will now have to “borrow” something from The Black Sheep. The only problem is, none of their articles would fit our high standards and thus we feel it is unfair to subject our readers to such inane drivel. But when The Black Sheep publishes something good enough for us to “borrow” we’ll be sure to let you know! Actually, we won’t, it’ll just be slipped into the paper with no credit whatsoever. This holiday season, we are thankful for you, our loyal readers, for your occasional and sparse support!
Hannah Lynn and Holly Stavarski
Editors in Chief